Boys will be boys, and girls are expected to act maturely from an early age, not to evoke any man’s worst impulses and if that happens, to take responsibility for it.
She got raped because she asked for it. Her brother slapped her. She must have done something very wrong. She got pregnant, and hence the family abandoned her.
Why does this lash come down to the woman from whom the cycle of life had started? Why do we have to blame something so pious to whom the gift of fertility been bestowed upon?
Well, we live in a male-dominated society, not completely but at least the majority of it. At least it is rightly so in the heads of a few men, who think that they are the “ALPHA”. Although, they’re still vulnerable they hide it all under the same pretence “I’m next in line to the heir” ergo, “I’ve to be the responsible one”.
Those Self- proclaimed ALPHAS are dominating partially because they carry that inflated egotistical attitude but mainly because their female counterparts let them do so.
The problem here is that women who keep fuelling the ego of such men are so weak that they do not realise that they are just used as per the convenience of the man, whom she thinks is her knight in shining armour.
And when that so-called “heir” realises that the time for ruling the throne is near, the woman suddenly becomes that cornered rusted sword;
- She is now the person who is treated as an option.
- She is now the person who is incapable of understanding any problem.
- She is now the person who has become incessantly selfish.
- She is now the person who is not worthy enough.
- She is now the person who hasn’t achieved anything in life. And
- She is now the person who’s… too big of a liability to handle.
Even in the Nirbhaya case, many were quick to point out that it was the victim’s fault for wandering at night and apparently not the perpetrators’ because they were just men overcome by urges.These men and their urges are so confusing that they cannot even form a coherent explanation towards it.
Many of the girls in their teens and early twenties go through a traumatic relationship, just because, her boyfriend wasn’t sure whether he wants to be with her or not?
Convince yourself and meticulously look out for these signs. Try not to let your passion/ infatuation/ attraction drive you in the direction of love and hold onto a wrong person. These are the signs to look out for:
- He isn’t putting any efforts. Leaves you in confusion. Doesn’t make time for you.
- He won’t appreciate what you’ve achieved perhaps he’s intimidated by your power and is the jealous one.
- He thinks that he has the authority over you to mould your actions as per his ways.
- He’ll only be willing to discuss things as per his convenience.
- He is a different person with you and everyone else.
- He has been the reason for your tears.
Let’s get a couple of things straight:
- Never go back to someone who broke your heart. This shows your inability as a person. High chances are you’ll never hold the same respect in your eyes.
- If the last days of a relationship or whole of it seemed like a burden and consumed a lot of your energy. We’re happy to say that it’s gone for good.
Rea arel emn ahrd ot nfdi?
Sorry for putting forth this question in a perplexed way … but just to make you understand be strong enough, trust your instincts, keep it simple and in time you’ll know.
Are real men hard to find?
Yes, they are… and all men want the same thing… if not they’ll have the audacity to say, let’s be friends with benefits. The commitment-phobic, surely will.
We admit that no one is perfect, but the absolutely real ones are. They are like that sponge which absorbs all negativity and emits positivity. Here are a few qualities of man you should be really looking out for:
- He’ll mean what he says and always be honest.
- He’ll never treat you like an option and will always make you feel better than good, better than most.
- He’ll always be up for a discussion, even when he’s tired or late from work.
- He’ll travel miles for you and of course, if your work takes you places, he’ll travel miles with you.
- You’ll be his numero uno priority. Ladies have followed the same tradition since ages.
- He’ll trust and respect you as a person and for the work you do.
- He’ll be your ultimate strength and the person you can rely upon. He might even take the gun for you, even when not in love.
- Is dignified, humble and is respected by every person in the room not merely for his fortune but for the person he is.
- He’ll be committed to his words, and he’ll never procrastinate just to be at ease.
- Most importantly: You’ll see it in his actions and not just his words.
At the end of the day, there is no excuse as to how it all went down-hill under the annoying childish “I didn’t think about it” pretence.
One thing that men don’t realise is that real women are the stronger ones in a relationship. It takes much courage to let people see the vulnerable side of us. I’m not just talking in an emotional sense here but physically as well.
We as women trust men with the authority and let them enter inside us. To know our most intimate segments and the darkest corners which encompasses the person we are today. The favour of that trust can never be returned through mediocrities or merely saying “you’re the strongest person I know”. The standards can only be met via equal respect and gratitude towards that woman.
On a general note, let’s teach our children to respect the opposite gender. Let’s teach our boys that sexual encounters are not feats to brag about. Let’s correct our boys for their behaviours instead of policing girls for the clothes they wear. Let’s raise our children to be responsible citizens who own up to their actions.
Perhaps then and only then, we’d raise a generation that truly understands the concepts of accountability and respect.