Swipe right, Swipe left and it’s that simple hooking up or making out with the applications like Tinder, Grindr and other similar websites. Love at first sight, meetings in secret, stolen kisses, and butterflies in our stomachs are probably old school thoughts now as we transcended barriers together, both physically and emotionally. In these busy lives, there is constant juggling of rigorous work hours and social life. Our physical needs have seemingly overpowered our emotional needs. Because who’s got time for love and relationships right?
Let’s go back to 30 years, to the times when our parents were probably as old as we are now. They knew not about hook-ups. Parks were the meeting places with lovers locked in embraces. Beaches were lined with interlocked hands, and an occasional tiff or two could be seen on the pavements. Sex wasn’t just something you would have with someone the night you met them. Kisses had passion and love in them, not lust. Couples laughed together, cried together, and died together. That was a generation ago. That was love.
Coming back to 2018, the line separating our generation and the one of our parents is distinctly visible. We now have forums which are simply used for hook-ups. A meaningless, no strings attached night or two spent with a complete stranger. And then with another stranger, and then another, and another. It has become majorly about the physical dimension of a relationship now. In our busy lives, we apparently do not have the time to devote to a loving, long-term relationship. But weren’t our parents busy too? How did they make it work so perfectly? What has changed in the past 30 years?
The blame game can be played upon here too. You could blame westernization. With the the introduction of western lifestyle, ideas, movies, TV shows, food and culture, the hook-up culture has seeped right in. Technology could be another culprit. With apps like Tinder, a hook-up is as easy as a swipe away, an enticing prospect perhaps. Another factor is your busy life, both work and social. But the primary reason stares back at you when you look into a mirror. Yes, YOU are to blame.
The various reasons are just excuses one makes to avoid commitment. There could be several reasons for that. You’ve been hurt before, due to which you’re hesitant to open up to someone again. Or maybe you’ve seen someone get hurt and you don’t want anything to do with emotions. Indeed, loving somebody means giving a person a huge hammer with your heart in their hands fervently hoping that they never use the hammer. Casual sex and hook-ups have no hammer, no heart, but what’s worse, they leave a hollow inside of you. You slowly become devoid of emotions and your heart turns into a lifeless stone.
Deep down, we all yearn for the feeling; not the hurt and the pain, but the feeling of ecstasy, the feeling of waking up next to the same person every day; the midnight talks; the cuddling; the sharing of dreams, ambitions, successes and failures. The feeling of LOVE.
But alas, ours is becoming the most lonely generation.